25 Things About Life I Wish I Had Known 10 Years AgoJuly 21, 2016
Something I’d like to share on my birthday.September 21, 2016
If it "Hurts" its not "Love"
Sometimes, life makes perfect sense for a few seconds before we go back to being confused about pretty much everything. Before we go back to searching and chasing and just trying to exist.
And recently, during one of those rare moments when the things we already know but often forget become clear, I had this thought:
One of the few things that actually matters in life is finding who and what we love and fighting like hell to hold onto those things.
Because, at its most basic, I think that’s what life is.
I want you to love me.
I need you to love me.
If you love me, I will be happy.
I think those are some of the most dangerous words in English. Dangerous to your sense of self worth, dangerous to your own happiness and dangerous to the concept of love itself.
- Love is a gift.
You may not ask for it.
Too often we confuse what we desire from someone else as love. That the emptiness of our own self worth can be replaced by someone else’s care. That our happiness is bound to someone else’s emotions. But that’s not true at all. You must give love to yourself and to others before it can be returned to you.
- Love is earned.
You cannot make someone love you.
Your actions, your gifts, your words, they cannot make anyone love you. Whether you buy them a diamond ring or walk them home from school every day, there is no formula that equates actions with love. Only the other person knows how they feel about you, and it’s up to them to express it only when and if they are ready.
- Love never hurts.
If you are feeling pain, that isn’t love. That is a lack of love. If you love so much that it “hurts” that isn’t love but an attempt to own the other person. Love is freeing, love makes no bonds. Only attachment does.
- Love is truth.
If you are unsure if you are in love, than you are not. Love is a fact. There is no wavering, there is only the white light of love surrounding you. Just like the sky is blue and water is wet, love cannot be questioned.
- Love dies.
Contrary to the prior point, love changes when you do. Love doesn’t last forever and neither do humans. The sun rises and sets and the cycle of life and love never ends. We are all a part of it and sometimes we lose what we hold most dear. But loss is not a part of love, tomorrow another love may be born.
- Love is infectious.
Grow it in your heart like you grow a seed. Find the beauty in life and in yourself. Sooner or later, someone else will see what you have grown and grow to love you too.